Is going to war human nature? Is this our natural state? There is no REAL human nature. Just a figure of speech to examine our current state. It’s kind of self-evident. Think about it. If all of this stuff, if all of the effort that is put in daily through the media, through everything we see in the news, everything we see through sports, constantly in advertising and everything that is pushed into our faces over and over again. If all of that wasn’t there would we be operating in the same way? Would be be stricken with fear? Would we constantly be seeing separation between everybody, judging people based on what they’re doing, wearing and how they’re acting?
All of this stuff is constantly needing to be there because if it wasn’t, we would go back into our natural state. We naturally would fall back to who we truly are. That’s why we see this happen so much. That’s why there is a huge level of effort to put in to keep all of this stuff sustained. If you look at the economy, if you look at the way the world functions, you will realize that it needs so much to stay sustained because it is completely against how we are and how we would function as ‘natural’ human beings.That’s why we’re seeing :
If it was gone, the world would be a completely different place. And that’s why there is so much fear ‘created’ around : “If the system drops what’s going to happen? They know that when it drops, the moment people aren’t affected by the system anymore is the moment that they will go back to their natural state and begin operating in a way that is cooperative, in a way that is community-based, where everybody is helping each-other out in moving forward.
There’s a fascinating TED talk by the brilliant Esther Perel–the author of ‘Mating in captivity’– where she explores the secret to desire in long term relationships. This of course is the holy grail.
Falling in love is the easy part : “The honeymoon period” — anybody would take that ride. But what happens upon the moment that routine becomes part of your reality? How do you retain that passion, that fire? This is again the mystery of long term desire. Esther Perel went around the world asking couples,”When are you most drawn to your partner?”. And what she found across the board was that everyone said the same thing. They found their partner most attractive when they were able to see their partner as a self-sustaining entity. It’s this idea that they were able to perceive their partner the way that other other people perceive them: A complete individual, a complete self-sustaining person. Not the ‘other half ‘ of you. But as a solid whole.
It’s an idea that attraction requires a kind of distance. Even desire requires a crossing over. I thought that was absolutely brilliant. How can we incorporate that into our own relationships? How can we create space between us and the ones we love so that we can retain that crossing over?How can we can see them as a self sustaining entity and fully appreciate them as the fully rounded, complete being that they are?
I think that she’s onto something. For that reason I think she’s brilliant and everybody should watch that TED talk because if we can hack into the secret of long term desire we could solve all of our problems.